Saturday, January 12, 2013

Voting

   People vote for the same reason newlyweds smash cake into each other's faces: because some idiot long ago did it first and all the other idiots saw an opportunity to be stupid and have it disguised as virtuous. Which is something stupid people really like. And need.
   Voting accomplishes for personal liberty the same thing pushing cake into each others' faces accomplishes for marriage: it guarantees failure from that instant onward. You can't undo it.
   Men actually like pushing cake into their bride's face: they know it's the last time and the only time they will be able to express their true feelings to their spouse in public. All further assaults will have to be done in the basement.
   And voters actually like voting: it is the only time until the next election they will feel like they are controlling things. And that's enough for them. Just like pushing the cake into the face is enough truth for most spouses, voting once every few years is enough liberty for most citizens. It's called "settling."

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