Wednesday, October 27, 2010

I Watched Sons of Anarchy

At the suggestion of someone who apparently likes to talk people into doing things that will make them fall asleep, i watched Sons of Anarchy, a show I had been uninterested in watching from the first glimpse of the first ad for it. It just LOOKED awful. Well I sat through an episode and it was a struggle. there is so much chatting it is like being in a tea room. it's not even dialogue, it's just chit chat. it's like soap opera conversation but not nearly as intensely magnetizing. Sometimes the chit chat gets so abysmally exhausting you want to run out the door screaming. I didnt have the option of changing the channel or turning off the set because i agreed to watch an episode. Sons of Anarchy is so awful you cant even ridicule it. it doesnt sink to the level of incompetence. it's professional, but it's uninteresting. It's like they got the laziest script writer on earth and said write some Sons of Anarchy episodes. I guess he has no need to make an effort because it has an audience. From what I have been able to determine it's an audience of Harley owners. Harley owners - 99% of them - want to be considered Hells Angels. If they just wanted to ride a motorcycle they would buy Hondas. They run better and last longer. But these Harley owners are not Hells Angels. But this doesn't seem to register. Since they're not Hells Angels but think they are - at least somewhere in their heads - anything regarding "outlaw bikers" is ok with them, yes sir, bring it right on over, let's dig into it and make it ours. Sons of Anarchy is - I presume - about outlaw bikers. If there is anything at all romantic and adventurous and advantageous about being an outlaw biker you will never catch a glimpse of it from the Sons of Anarchy. It's hard to say what makes them go on from day to day. If "sworn to fun and loyal to none" is the mantra of the outlaw biker the Sons of Anarchy need to be disbanded. They're about as much fun as eels on the kitchen floor. Even their motorcycles are boring. My understanding of a renegade wild and wooly American biker is that he considers himself an individual and he considers his bike an individual. And makes it look like one. The bikes on Sons of Go-Along
were even more dreary than the riders on them. Most of them had fairings - wind-deflectors. What kind of wild and wooly maniac for the high life has those. Grampa has those. And so does his big fat wife as they load up their two-wheeled behemouths and explore the coast of Oregon for five weeks. In one scene one of the wild and wooly renegades is having a chat - there's lots of chats - with a PRIEST, Inside a CHURCH. I could not bring myself to actually listen to what they were saying. I sensed that it was some bogus right and wrong lecture and discussion of a Socratic nature and it was very unlikely there was going to be any wisdom forthcoming from either chatterer. It was just too much to bear to pay attention. There was also a baby involved. Peg Bundy went to Ireland from California to have a tedious hook-up with some woman who had her baby. You know, the usual hell-on-wheels stuff. There was a befuddling "fight club" scene i guess so the homos watching the show could see some man skin. And maybe to convey the idea that bikers are Vikings because it all looked very medieval and dim, like in torchlight. I mean the exhaustion just piled up and piled up. The Sons of Ordinary are not what you would call thinkers: they leave a terrified little boy to guard a gym or the clubhouse or some place when they know a rival gang is anxious to kill the old jew who owns the building, Then they give him a pistol which he holds like its crawling with radioactive spiders. Well he proves to be worthless as a security guard. No wonder the Sons of Anarchy are always in a dilemma: they're idiots. I will never watch another episode for the same reason i will never watch another episode of that horrible show with that harmon guy in it....CSSI, or something with a tone of meaningless letters; it's just too boring. Actually the CUVLSMFT show is bad, not boring. There is a difference.


At November 2, 2010 at 8:05 PM , Blogger Backwater said...

that about covers it.

At November 12, 2010 at 9:12 PM , Blogger Bamm Bamm said...

Completely agree, it's just a soap opera for HOG wannabes.

At November 13, 2010 at 5:16 PM , Blogger Backwater said...

Now THAT was nasty, but I fear true.


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