Catholics vs. Protestants

It ain't all Obama bashing here, sometimes I take a break from that fucker and have an intermission where I explain the inexplicable. Protestants and Catholics hate each other, just like Sunnis and Shiites hate each other. Sunnis and Shiites are both Muslims but one group thinks the other group is the "wrong" kind of Muslim and therefore needs to be killed by the other kind of Muslim. It is exactly the same with Catholics and Protestants. The main argument between the two groups is, the Catholics believe that you have to work your way to heaven, which is a non existent place you go to when you are dead. The Catholics have obviously never seen a corpse otherwise they might wonder about the factuality of this "where you go after you are dead" business. You pretty much quit going places when you are dead. You will NEVER convince a Catholic of this, no matter how smart he is, no matter how stupid he is. The Protestants believe that you don't have to do anything to get to, ya know, the more favorable of the two locations of the Next Life, that Jesus did all the work for you. But you do have to "BELIEVE ON HIM" in order for the, ya know, train ticket to get punched by the conductor. In other words, you still have to work your way into heaven, TO SOME EXTENT, but only in this one aspect. Oh, and a lot of Protestant sects add a few other obligations that seem to vary in amounts from sect to sect. So basically there is no difference between Protestants and Catholics when you remove the skins of both species and examine the muscles and bones there on the laboratory slab and under a bright light. The Catholics also elevate Jesus' Jew mom to a position equal to, if not surpassing, Jesus himself. That, basically, it's a two-man operation, this afterlife stuff, and Mary did as much as Jesus did in whatever it was Jesus actually did. Protestants fume actual fire out their nostrils at this notion. They are like Muslims when you tell a Muslim that Christians believe Jesus is the Diety. They go into a fury and yearn to kill and kill again, starting with the adults and ending with the children and pets. Catholics ALSO believe "the church" is just as powerful as God Almighty. Maybe even more so if it comes to a showdown. Protestants have a very tough time with this too. And that whole Jesus Is Inside Bread Wafers thing. I do have to say Protestants detest Catholics a whopping lot more than Catholics detest Protestants. Most Catholics don't even know what Protestants are, exactly. To Catholics Protestants are kind of like Mormons or Jovies, just some other sort of semi-Christian religion that has churches with crosses without a body on them.