Sunday, February 22, 2009

Eaten By Horses

People are not aware that horses will sometimes eat a fallen rider. It's a form of revenge. The Indians say it used to happen to them a LOT. During the buffalo chases it wasn't uncommon for one reason or another for the whole hunting party of 5 or 6 men to get upended during a chase, because, let's face it, riding into a buffalo herd with a goal of killing one of them is not something the buffalo will just stand still for. They try and resist. The Indians were never surprised to get tossed off their horses during a chase but it was a problem whenever they ALL got dumped because it was likely the freed horses would take the opportunity to quickly gather aaround one of the riders on the ground, usually one who was unconcious, and begin eating him. This was a sight that never failed to terrify the Indians because horses are herbivores. They do not eat meat. They eat plants. Exclusively. The Indians make it clear that the horses did not just bite and yank. They swallowed. They feasted. They ate. They ate their riders. Once in a while, in modern times, you can find the occasional Indian who will tell you that the Indian "ponies" detested their Indian masters. Apparently Indians treated horses even worse than they treated each other. I have never been able to get an Indian to tell me exactly why. They all clearly don't like to even talk about it. Whatever Indians did to horses it fucked up the entire horse psychology so bad that it was not uncommon for groups of horses to take a weird, almost hellish, freaky sort of revenge. By eating their keepers. A very PRACTICAL bad aspect of these flesh feasts at the jaws of horses was that the remaining hunting party was bound by Indian law and custom to abandon the horses forever, those who ate human flesh. Nor were they to kill them. They had to just let them go. Horses who did this were considered to be inhabited by entities from another dimension. Sort of like demonic possession. White people who work with horses don't like to talk about it either. I found that out the hard way when after learning about the Indians and their sometimes being eaten by their horses, I asked a ranch hand if he ever heard of a horse eating meat. He, like, went all frozen for just a split second, like I had just told him about the first time he ever jacked off, like I knew something there was no way I could know and he might have to kill me. Then he was all real normal again and "laughed." He said horses don't eat meat. I said "You ever hear of a horse eating its rider?" He got mad and said horses don't eat meat! I said I heard that once in a while a pack of horses will
ravenously eat a fallen rider if he's alone, or lays down on the ground inside a corral full of horses. The Indians told me about that happening too. He went all blue in the face and ordered me off the property. He was at full cowboy-level wrath. I left immediately. Cowboys are amazingly strong for skinny guys. They all have chimpanzee strength. And they don't tire. I'd rather tangle with a fucking Hells Angel. If you're on your feet after 30 seconds he's usually bent over with his hands on his knees, breathing like a 90 year old with TB. A cowboy will beat the crap out of you for hours if he feels like it.

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