The Closer

There is some show on tv called The Closer about some broad who gets confessions out of people. That's fine but she gets these confessions through the worst Texas accent this side of Afghanistan that must have Texans crawling around on their bellies screaming in pain and anguish. I mean, I ain't even from Texas and blood comes out of my ears when this twanging goon drones and "does Texas stuff" with her nasal passages. The show's been on for 4 years and there hans't been one shred of improvement in her accenting abilities. She started out shitty and she held her ground fiercely. There has been no advance or retreat: she is dead off target and that's where she stays. And her lips look like inner tubes.