The Fucking French

I know why the French hate Americans. I just learned from a 1988 magazine I was ripping apart and throwing away that the word "champagne" is a copyrighted word is not recognized in the USA. The French are convinced the word "champagne" can only be applied to certain kinds of wine made in France. We ought to make them a deal: we'll stop using the word champagne here if they'll give France back to the Nazis.