Creationism

Creationism is an attempt by Satanically motivated versions of Christianity to further divorce Christianity from people with intelligence. And they are doing a REALLY FANTASTIC JOB OF IT TOO. Because no one with a brain in his head or even in his ass would give Christianity as much attention as they give their own anal warts once they got a whiff of Creationism. It literally came out of nowhere. Just like creation did. HAHAHAHAHA. I didn't mean to say anything funny but I guess I did. Made ME laugh. So I guess it was funny. That's how you tell. If it makes ME laugh, it's probably pretty funny. Where was I. Creationism is the idiotic-even-for-idiots proclamation that all of human science is a lie, and that "creationism" - the biggest lie in history since the one told to Adam - is the only truth about Nature that there is. These motherfuckers have literally come out of the woodwork like an aggressive mold spore. And there is no shortage of astoundingly moronic Christians who think that these guys are the Intelligence Army of God coming to rid the earth of superstition and paganism. Even Wiccans and Druids, maybe even the Mayans and their guts-hauling priests, would be shocked at the logic and reasoning of these psychotic shitheads. Creationism is so complicated and bizarre it's like LSD in prose form. It's like listening to a sweat and saliva soaked lecture in logic by the Joker. It's like tryiing to understand what Obama means by "change" based just on what he actually says he's saying. It's like trying to understand the scribbling of a bum in the park with a sheaf of inked papers under his arm that has been in three winters of snow and rain and used as a pillow every night besides.(I saw a bum once in downtown L.A. who was a totally white caucasian man whose skin from life outside was completely black, just as though Vegemite with shoe polish in it had been smeared all over him. But it was dirt. Layers and layers of dirt accrued and lost so often that only the oily, tarlike, most adhesive essences of each molecule remained, and then over the years of this process he was covered in this Essence of Bathlessness. Like how a stalamtite accrues slightly with each drop of water even though 99.999999% of each drop of water splashes away into oblivion and drippage. This fellow had clutched under his arms, and was guarding like a mad dog guards everything, a thick, unsecured stack of loose yellow legal-pad sheets of paper, about 200 sheets thick. Which were a lot cleaner than he was. This monster of filth-laden lunacy and hopelessness was a writer. I know what you're thinking. That it was me. No, actually no. It wasn't. But I do have to admit he, and a lot of others just like him downtown, and some women too, all with their skanky sloppy piles of filled-up writing paper clutched in their arms, did keep reminding me whenever I saw one of these folks that either writing drives people crazy and out into the cold, or that the worst life possible turns people into writers. Where was I.) Creationism is more complicated than the reasons why people do sudoku or watch Lost. Not one thing connects to anything else. Where "normal science" is a constant progress toward integration and unification, Creationism Science invents an entire new body of knowledge daily, unconnected in any way to anything else they came up with the day before, to explain any divergence of Creationism from Reality. And Creationism's divergences from Reality are more common than divergences in Mammoth Caves from each other. Not only are the Creationists astoundingly dumb they are energetic about it. "Aggressively stupid" was the way I used to describe some of my fellow workers and a lot of the managers where I once worked. Creationists are this way. They actually "apply themselves" to conjuring up new ways to compound their lunacy and look retarded. They stay awake real late dreaming up new ways to make Christianity look like prancing buffoonery. They are completely impervious to anything that would fall into the category of "evidence" in any science. They refute science so much it is addedly astounding that they use the same science to propound their own "evidence." By that I mean, they denounce the scientific method and then use the scientific method toprove that their denouncement is valid. Holy fucking shit. I mean, it just gets crazier and crazier with these people. Not only that, there is no way to even figure out any possible motive for what the hell it is they are so baboonly insistant upon doing. They SAY their motive is to "prove the Bible right.{" Good Lord Jesus Fucking Christ Almighty With tits!.... if God ever finds out about what they're doing to prove Him real He's gonna Shit His fucking Pants. (I have capitalized shit and fucking and pants because this is God's shit and fucking and pants we are talking about here.) The whole thing - Creationism - SEEMS to have started with a bewilderingly duncelike effort to "refute" Darwin. Who THEY insist was an atheist. Even though Darwin himself claims he wasn't. But their attitude is what the fuck does he know about it: what the hell does HE know what he believes. I mean, you just want to kick their asses just for existing, don't you? I don't know why they even persist in claiming Darwin even existed. Why not just say he was a myth. A character in a Dickens novel or something. Let's take it to the final level of stupidity. Now, a "theory" this insane, and with SO MANY FUCKING ADHERENTS has to have a bigger explanation than just "random screwballs doing their thing." There aren't that many random screwballs, for one thing. Not even in Christianity. But there ARE that many screwballs in ISLAM. So therefore Creationism is an ISLAMIC theory. Not a Christian one. So why are the creationists insisting that they are Christians. For the same reason Tom Cruise is insisting he's a Scientologist: to bring the religion crashing down in a cascading avalanche of ridicule and humiliation. Now things are suddenly bright and clear, aren't they. Well, aren't they? Well then you could be SO fucking dumb you might need the ATTENTION of a Scientologist. Hey, don't thank me, Scientology!!....Happy to ship idiots your way!!!